Sunday, June 7, 2009

Interpret the Dream

Last night I had a very frightening dream. I was in a very tall building with many windows. There were many children around me, and I was responsible for guiding them through the building. A noise came from above, and there were windows right through the roof, even though the building was many stories high. I looked up, and saw what looked like the Space Shuttle or a very large plane falling to the earth. I could see the fire coming from the exhaust of the engine, or it could have been the engine itself falling through the building.

As if in slow motion, I gathered the children and instinctively dashed for a long, cement corridor. Turning into another corridor, I saw the fireball barrel through the hallway, and towards the children and me. The building we were in was coming down all around us, and it seemed as though a bomb hit. I could see waterpipes above falling to the ground, and I could feel the thunderous movement of the earth, as though the floor was being pulled out from us.

Oddly though, through all the chaos, the children were calm and unharmed. I could feel the burning of the air, but I myself was not on fire. Despite expecting to be consumed by the fire, it did not harm us. We walked out of the building, intact. When we emerged from the building, we couldn't believe the destruction around us.

Now, I have had plane crash dreams before. The first was when I was about 5, and I never knew if there was a major air disaster at the time, but it occurred again the night before the AeroMexico/Cerritos plane crash. Most recently, I saw the Air France plane crash in a dream. In each one, I often have little details, like an all white plane over the ocean. Although the details are never enough to know if it is going to happen, I almost always get it within 2 days of the occurance.

I was once told by a spiritual director that these were given to me to incite me to pray. Unfortunately, I am a lot like my patron saint, St. Teresa of Avila, in that I'm not the best at prayer. Oh, if I can imagine talking to someone directly, I can. But usually to meditate on just a rote prayer, I'm gone. So if this is sent to me, it seems a bit of a waste.

However, if this is to incite me to get others to pray, if only to say a simple prayer of protection for the sake of children who may be affected by a travel accident, then I'm good with that. I tend to have the gift of gab, and yakking to others to pray for one thing or the other seems benign enough.

This one has me concerned though. If it is a prophetic dream, and it is NOT an air disaster, I am worried this is actually a dream of symbolism. If so, I have to piece the damned thing apart and figure out what each item represents.

Since I am weary of these dreams, and since I am also very lazy, I ask you to help me understand it. Being a mother, I can understand the symbolism of the children in my dream. But the rest is odd. Why the large building? Why the window to the sky? Why the plane crashing through it? Why did I go to the cement corridor? Why, when I expected the fire to consume me, was I not destroyed by it? Why were the children there with me? What did the water pipe signify? Most of all, when we stepped out and emerged from the wreckage, why were we the only ones left?

I hate these dreams. Some say it is a gift. I must agree with St. Teresa when she said they are a curse. The raw emotions, the fear, agony, dread, panic and amazement are as real as if I were actually there. And until I am able to decipher it, it will haunt me.

Any insights are welcome.

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